We had a major undertaking a week ago…planning and arranging most of the details for a 'mass wedding'. It was prompted by one of our newest leaders becoming a pastor of his section of town. He had gone through the formalities required by custom, of paying the bride price and officially taking his wife by customs of the land about 20 years ago. His father forced him to get married while the family still had cows to pay for the dowry to the Bride's father. Soon after, the cows his father paid as the dowry were raided, he barely escaped the north with his life, his young wife endured terrible things and survived with her life. One day, young Thomas was walking along the path when the rebels stopped him, his brother and 2 friends. Even then Thomas was known as 'pastor'. He watched his brother and friends be shot. One of the rebels tried to speak for Thomas to allow him to survive. That rebel angered his colleagues and was sent to shoot Thomas behind a tree. When Thomas heard him say "RUN" he never looked back. An d many years later they made it south eventually to Kampala where Thomas began working as a night security guard. He soon became known as pastor of the guard fellowship.
Thomas and Florence had never been able to have a church wedding, or to make vows before God and people. They have 7 children, all living in a room the size of most of our master bathrooms.
We decided that if we were going to help him get married in simple way (according to custom here!) we might get others who are in a similar situation: documents in order legally, already having families, but never having made a public vow before God and church members in marriage. And, specifically, those who could never dream of affording or raising enough money: the stumbling block to thousands of couples here.
So, for 6 couples, they shared the cost of the church sound crew, singers, musicians. We helped them by finding used wedding dresses they could wear free of charge, advising them to combine in 2 or 3 taxi vans instead of renting cars for each bride and each groom. We arranged for a simple food instead of a messy, long and complicated full serving line for 400 people. We told them not to worry about flowers, or brides maids. Stay focused on the purpose of the event! We Kampala Urban Team baked American cakes, and decorated them: in line for one of the most talked about things! Those mzungu (white man) cakes that were so good! So many details to planning a wedding for one, but to become wedding planners for 6 on the same day!?!
We had the wedding vows for one couple at a time led by our friend and pastor of Kampala Baptist Church , so they each felt that it was their own wedding. Anthony preached the wedding sermon, and had a focus on how Paul said women submit…and one might expect the next line to be in contrast: men rule over. If one submits, the other rules over. But no, Paul said for men to love, just as Christ loved the church. He ended by asking the wives to get on their knees as they promise d to help their men be the best husbands, fathers, Christians they can be. And taking example of Jesus when he washed the feet of his disciples—the beginning church in one sense—Anthony also asked the men to get on their knees as the servant leaders. It was quite a stir and commotion! But these men were tender and had sincere faces as they promised to help their wives be the best women, mothers, Christians they can be.
It has apparently been the topic of several Radio shows also this week. On the radio it was compared to a wedding at a church near where we live where the pastor spent 300 million shillings (almost $170,000). This mass wedding was given as the new model of weddings that should now set a precedent!
With our help, and the help of a Sunday School class in the U.S., combined with a few other people who helped support (and the help of the KUT baking 20 cakes!), church members who donated their wedding dresses for the single use:
We saw pastor Thomas and other house group leaders marry—all six couples for a total contribution of a little over $1,000. That comes to about $170 per couple.
When I helped 2 of them try on dresses just 2 days before the wedding, they were each asked to sign their name and give their cell phone number. One of the women did not even know how to write her name. The second woman only knew how to form the letters to write her name. There are other funny stories to tell, but not all appropriate for an email going to many people!! =) Talk about a fairy tale? This was a dream these women never imagined would happen to them. And these men never imagined how they could afford the cultural demands of huge wedding costs.
Too bad the newspaper article make one assume that Andrew Mwenge (our good friend!---(NOTE: He was in Hot Springs Arkansas for Men's prayer breakfast and Wednesday evening service this past spring.) preached the sermon, instead of Anthony/Tony. Also the writer did not exactly get correct what the connection all these men had: leaders and a pastor in our network of house churches. Anyway, thought you might like to see the link.
0 comments:
Post a Comment